Smile

It is as quiet and as empty as I wanted it to be.

No more questions,

No more impatience,

No more frowning,

Or incoherence,

At last.

"Now then, get up, you are alright," I said,

When you refused to budge.

Crease lines etched across your forehead, deepening,

No smile, no twinkle,
Drooping cheeks and anxious eyes,

Yet, I tried.

"It's your favourite movie!",

"Look at his face, crinkled up comically!",

 Smile!

 But you didn't.

"Look at these pictures,"

"That's me in your arms, gurgling with laughter."

And then I could see,

A hint of a smile, maybe.

Worry shouldn't be your best friend,

Medicines won't cheer you up.
Look at me, and look at her, and him,
And all your favourite things,
That make you gladsome,
That make you smile.

Anger couldn't hide itself.

This was all wrong.
Spill your secrets,
The darkest ones,

Why couldn't you?

All I wanted was you to be alright.

I stamped upon the gloom,
That caught up with the days,            

Flying past swiftly,

Drowning myself in a world of make believe,

With all things happy and wonderful,
Catchy riffs, puppy love, and words.

Laugh, laugh, laugh!
Pretty smile that lights up your eyes.

Ask, ask, ask!
Those questions, silly and stupid

Else this isn't you.

But, they grew dimmer, your eyes.

Feeble tones to your voice,
Breathing harder to survive.

Still, I forced myself,

To make you smile.

I could stamp no more after a point.
I asked Him hence,

To ease you,
To make you smile.

A miracle maybe,

"Heal her!"I pleaded.

"Only one way," He said.

Bittersweet it tasted,

Plunged sharp into the folds of my skin,
He called it Pain.

You didn't say bye,
But you did.
They said you didn't smile,
But you did.
I know,
I can see it in my mind's eye,
That beautiful smile that lights up your eyes.

My stint at poetry writing, that I dedicate to Paati, my wonderful grandmother.

R.I.P

A live gig at last!

An air of excitement.
An ever-increasing crowd swarming around the heavily lit stag like fireflies attracted to a glowing lantern.
Getting mobbed and elbowed by people.
Claustrophobia coupled with anticipation.
Screaming oneself hoarse as the band members/ artistes make their entry.
Hooting and cheering that would split your eardrums.
Craning your neck to a get at least a glimpse of your favorite artiste or band.
Jumping up and down, swaying to the tunes.
Bellowing loudspeakers that make your heart bounce up and down.
Dancing in drunken stupor.
The smell of weed and tobacco hanging heavily in the air.
When beer breath fans on your face.
Oblivious couples getting cozy and romantic, in the midst of Imogen's performance.
ENCORE!
Headbanging!
Exclaiming, "That was the SHIZ dude!", as the show comes to an end.

Summed it up pretty well I guess.

I have never watched any band perform live. I experienced it for the first time at the 'Nh7 Weekender' music festival, a fortnight ago. It was brilliant. Unfortunately I couldn't attend all three days of the festival; ended up missing out on gigs performed by 'Indian Ocean', 'Scribe', 'Swarathma' and the likes. Boy, was that disappointing. However, watching Imogen Heap, 'Raghu Dixit Project', 'Advaita' and 'Soulmate' perform was great and we did enjoy ourselves thoroughly.

One gets to see all sorts of characters at such events.

The ardent music lovers who definitely know what fusion, folk, alternative, electronica, metal and jazz is about. Then you find the wannabe music lovers who pretend to lip sync Imogen's 'Speeding Cars' and have a fake-mesmerized look plastered on their faces when Advaita's Ujjwal Nagar sings his 'aalaaps'. You see the mindless hooters, who yell "ONCE MORE!" after every song. The crazy drunks who head bang to jazz tunes. Also those, whose faces are covered by a cloud of cigarette smoke. The poor souls who have been dragged to this show by their friends, openly show their lack of interest, by fiddling with their cellphones whilst the frenzied crowd jumps to Raghu Dixit's 'Mysore se aayi'. Amidst all the various sounds, you also hear the passionate cynics' annoying buzz. "Haha, do you call that singing? Imogen sucks bigtime!".  I have mentioned the romantic couples who make themselves conspicuous by indulging in passionate embraces and kisses.

Ah! these shows are not as unadulterated as they seem to be at first.

I wasn't a big fan of indie music earlier, but now I definitely am. Also, I can confidently say that I belong to the category of ardent music lovers. Yes. Yes.

First.When you experience anything for the first time, it never fades from your mind . The most memorable. Be it good or bad.

It really was the SHIZ.