Wednesday 18 July 2012

Big Plans

Why is everything going against my favor? I want a lot of stuff to happen. To agree. All that wishful thinking to come true.

Do you hear me?

It's a question that bothers every believer.

I have my own staunch beliefs. I don't pray everyday. But I do think of you everyday. I just need to know if things will be alright.

Do I have to join my hands, bow my head, cross my legs, and recite prayers to get what I want?

I keep reassuring myself with the thought that you have big plans for me. I know you do. I can't wait for them to get actually implemented.

I'm not a practical person by nature. I am very impulsive, and I usually let my emotions take control of my rationality.

It's not like you don't read my mind. You do.

I remember a song I haven't heard in ages. I switch on the radio, and I hear it playing.

I miss my best friends terribly. I crave to see them. I receive a message from them stating they will be in town soon.

The minute I become over-confident, something brings me back to ground level.

I get a premonition that my grandfather is going to leave us forever very soon,and sure enough he does.

Is it a coincidence? Or are there omnipresent invisible detectors you have set up, to discern my musings, my speculations and intuitions?

I don't know.

I know you care. Sometimes everything moves so fast that I find it difficult to breathe, while sometimes it trudges drearily. How long should I wish for better circumstances?

I'm running out of whatever little patience I had, conserved so carefully.


  1. Anjali,

    I know it sounds cliche, and I know it's a difficult concept to buy into, but I firmly believe everything happens in its own time . . . when and how it should unfold. So many time I have wondered many of the same things, but then - a door opens as another closes. Be patient, my young friend. I am sure Life and The Universe has glorious things in store for you! Thanks for sharing! :)

  2. Struggle is a beautiful anguish of soul. (The beauty comes later.) Even in trial, Love surrounds. Sending you love, peace and good thoughts your way...hang in there, Anjali!

  3. Look, it's these things that mould us into who we are, it just takes a while to accept. People hate to change out of their comfort zone and that's understandable. But it's up to you to make your plans come true. They're yours, not anyone else's so why make it a chore? Think of it as a hobby instead.

    1. I'm used it but, it gets onto your nerves after a point - staying out of your comfort zone. Was in one of my random moods last night. :)

      Thanks for sharing thoughts! :)