The Late Latif

It's never too late - never too late to start over, never too late to be happy.

- Jane Fonda

 I had a sudden urge to put down a cliched quote. So there.

My summer break is coming to an end. I went through the syllabus for the third semester. Pretty interesting. So yeah, I'm kind of looking forward to college, even though it's the onslaught of monsoon which invariably means mucky bike rides, bad hair days, abstinence from street food (Damn!), potholes, torturous traffic jams, and probably occasional colds.

Yes I know,  I'm one of those weirdos who doesn't think monsoon is awesome.

Still going to college doesn't seem to be a bad idea.
 

Summer wasn't that eventful. Yet, I notice there's been a spurt of sudden optimism within me to make the best of all the time I have in hand. 

 

 I just feel like time is running out. I'm going to turn twenty next year, and I'm ignorant about a lot of stuff. Basic stuff.

I have always been late when it comes to learning anything. Almost. I was late when it came to -

• Cooking; I should have started that a year or two ago
• Managing finances. I just learnt how to operate my debit card. (Never mind)
• Watching How I Met Your Mother. I just started watching the whole thing from scratch, two weeks ago.
• Downloading the Red Hot Chilli Peppers' latest album, that was released last year.
• Watching Inception, that was released two years ago.
• Going in for a wardrobe makeover. (I was stubborn.)

Especially when it came to realizations...

• All my close friends are NOT my best friends.
• Nobody has the time to hear me ranting miserably. Narcissism creeps in inadvertently, and they start comparing their problems with mine.
  
  Me : "So yeah, I'm really messed up. I don't know what's wrong. Do they hate me?"
  Friend : "I know what you mean, exactly. There was this time when I felt the same way. I argued with my boyfriend and..."
  
  
• There's a life beyond dating and relationships.
• I suck at being a wannabe.
• Not all boys are jackasses.
• I have turned into a couch potato.
• I'd feel happier splurging my own cash.
• I like peanut butter
• I wouldn't want to get drunk. I'm not curious either.
• Excessive gossip has a bad effect on me. I get grouchy and bitchy.
• Depression kills my appetite. 
• I need to meet new people. Depending on my old friends all the time for company hasn't helped me much.
• My mom is really cool.
• My sister is really awesome.
• My dad is fantastic.

The biggest realization - I need some change.

I'm changing as a person. I know it. I can feel it. It's probably due to the grave circumstances that had plagued my house a while ago. The somberness is still conspicuous, the only difference being that I have learnt to deal with it. Those things that really affected me earlier - a break-up, minor arguments and misunderstandings with friends, and being single - seem trivial now. I don't feel like wasting my time, getting upset over petty incidents. I don't feel like pondering. I just feel like learning something new everyday. I like working on my own. At the sane time, I desire to meet new people and visit new places. I want a taste of independence.

Wow, I know it sounds like an awe-inspiring speech that ought to be backed up by an intense realization-dawning-upon-me background music. But I mean all of it.

Sometimes, I get a complex thinking how sheltered and ignorant I had been all this while. But I guess there's still time to perfect myself, and to gain more experience.